Hey.  Today is my first birthday, whatever that means.  

My folks are throwing me one hot mess of a party this Saturday.  Not sure what that is either, but I’m guessing I’ll sleep through the whole thing.  That’s how I do thangs.

Don’t tell dad, but I heard mommy say she’s droppin’ some serious coin on this shin dig.

I think she should deposit that money in my savings bond or a high yielding long term CD, but mommy knows what’s up.  She’s always reading this book with some blonde lesbian on the cover.  What’s her name?  Susy… Suze…Orma… lesbian… I’m not sure.

Hmmm K, I gotta go pretend peekaboo with the laptop screen is still funny.  It’s not sexy, but it pays for the Teddy Grahams.  Peace suckas.  Holla at yo boi!

 

Important Disclaimer☞Some of my best friends are lesbians